It was January 19th, my birthday. The only people who knew what I was going thru were Frank, my 2 girl friends who were doing Pilates with me, my Pilates teacher ( a pillar of strength and a breast cancer survivor), and my girlfriend Sally who's dog Ellie is my dog's girlfriend. My Pilates girlfriends only knew because I had missed class for all my tests. I had to tell them why I missed. I told Sally the morning of my bday as we walked the dogs. For my bday she said let's go to lunch. As I was about to head into Peasant and the Pear (great restaurant) Dr. Gottlieb called to discuss my situation. As I sat in the parking lot talking with him, I slowly came to the conclusion, there is no other choice for me. I have to have a double mastectomy. It was rare to have two types of breast cancer in 2 different locations within 3 years. What I considered not breast cancer, DCIS Stage 0, really was considered breast cancer.
I took a deep breath after my conversation and had a great lunch with a wonderful friend. I went thru the motions, picking up the kids from school, getting snacks. Frank suggested we go out to dinner to celebrate my day. I reluctantly said sure. The restaurant supposedly could not take us until 7:00 and we were going to go over to my girlfriends house for a pre birthday dinner glass of wine. The kids would join us later.
As Frank and I walked up to my girlfriends house, I was still grappling with how am I going to tell my friends without sobbing. As the door opened, there were all my girlfriends "Surprise!". If there was ever a time I wanted to strangle my husband this was it. I gave him a look that said it all. As my girls friends all moved into the kitchen, I couldn't help myself. I spilled the beans. Nothing like being a party downer! Well my worry of how to tell my friends was solved. A positive in a negative situation.
So I have had a few days go by and I'm doing better. I know what needs to be done and I'm OK with it since it means I won't have to deal with this situation again.
Keep me company as I travel thru my journey facing breast cancer again.
Why would anyone want to read about someone else's problem when you have plenty of your own? Maybe one day a loved one, a friend, or you will be diagnosed with breast cancer. My blog might offer insite into cancer resources, thoughts, questions to ask, or guidance in helping you deal with this disease. These are my experiences and suggestions. Every breast cancer is different. If you are touched by breast cancer, be sure to consult your Dr. for direction in treatment.
I equate my blog to the emergency evacuation instruction the flight attendants do before you take off on an airplane. Nobody pays attention to them but when your plane is about to crash you think, "sh*t, why didn't I pay more attention to them? Which color cord do I pull first again?" We have so many things going on in our lives that one more thing to dwell on that doesn't apply to us right now may not be important but when it does, we wish we would have paid attention.
My blog is something you might read a couple times or maybe follow. Hopefully you gain some knowledge about breast cancer, in particular, Invasive Lobular Carcinoma (ILC). It is the 2nd most common type of invasive breast cancer however it only accounts for approx. 10% of all invasive breast cancers. It is the silent breast cancer. It is generally not detected with a mammo but rather an ultrasound. Invasive Lobular Carcinoma (ILC) is what I have been diagnosed with. My suggestion to every woman who is of mammo age insist on an ultrasound with your mammos.
UPDATE 3/2011
I have had my bilaterial mastectomy and I am recovering. ILC is a sneaky cancer as I said above. My various Dr.'s here and at UCSF confirmed the size of my tumor should be between 2.5cm-3.5cm with possibilty but not most likely, 7cm. After my surgery, my tumor was confirmed to be 11cm. My Dr.'s are very knowledgeable and are on top of things. This is simply the truth about ILC. I had mammos every 6 months, ultra sounds, and MRI's. With all of these, it was not picked up until 1/2011. The good news, if you can call it that, only 1 sentinel node out of 2 has micromastic findings and 5 aux. nodes were negative.
Be sure to start my adventure from the blog history on the right. I have tried to bold points to make it easier to extract the important information. If there is anything you get out of this blog, refer to my Dr.'s listed below if you know someone who has been diagnosed with breast cancer in the East Bay. These Dr.'s; Dr. Gottlieb, Dr. Wotowic, and Dr. Sherman are my 3 musketeers....all for 1 and 1 for all!
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